Just like you catch more flies with honey than vinegar, tact and consideration go a long way when it comes to successful deal making. In his most recent article for Inc., BigSpeak’s EVP Ken Sterling shares his tips for smoother negotiations.

With decades of business experience under his belt, Sterling has learned the hard way that deals are about much more than the bottom line, and that high IQ does not translate to unilateral success.  He shares a story of a time in his early career in which he was working a deal with a large tech company that was going swimmingly– until, that is, he bluntly shot down a somewhat naive suggestion from his potential partner. While the idea was on the foolish side, to be sure, his arrogant response resulted in the deal falling through, as the tech company’s representatives were turned off by the overly confident display.

In the years since, Sterling has developed a few more tactful approaches to dealing with negotiations where one partner has suggested a less than stellar idea.

1. Pause: don’t blurt out an answer right away and risk brusiing feelings. Stop, oxygenate, and seek to understand.
2. Restate: Repeat the other person’s suggestion to clarify if that really is what they mean. If so…
3. Yes, And: Shift the mindset into one of collaboration, saying “yes, we could do (partner’s idea), and we can also think of doing (your own, sounder idea).”

This more collaborative approach avoids making partners into adversaries, opening up opportunities for better deals and better outcomes.